Week 2 Recap: I’m Not Sure If This Was a Good Idea

“Chipo, are you sure about this?” – Self

Another week, another chance to find my way through this thing.

Last week started off really well, but a couple of major curved balls led to two posts and nothing from Wednesday to Friday.

There’s no need to embellish my observations. Last week was hard and I wasn’t able to meet my goal of five posts a week.

But, it hasn’t stopped me from showing up today.

Sometimes, I find myself thinking,

“Why on earth did I agree to this challenge in the first place?” 

I’ll be honest and admit that I’m writing this with a bit of angst in my chest. You’d think, after 2 or 3 years of being vulnerable online, I’d be used to this.

I’m a firm believer in sharing all parts of the process, but I am human too. The thought of saying, 

“Hey, guys. So last week didn’t work out either,” makes me feel nervous because who wants to admit that they’re “failing”?

The anxiety in me pictures the ones shaking their heads thinking, “Girl, give it a rest you aren’t ready.” And while I may never encounter these people face-to-face, the thought still daunts me. No one likes showing their mistakes in front of the world – even if the world is 30 – 40 readers.

I guess it’s part of the conditioning that comes with “Hustle” culture. You have to have everything together at all times.

But, I can’t blame hustle culture alone. There is also the part of me that questions when will I get this right? When does this process become a well-oiled machine?

I’ll be honest and admit that I’ve wondered if I’m ready for this. Did I start too early? Should this have waited?

Simple answer: No.

As I share my fears, doubts, and concerns, I can also acknowledge the stubborn resilience in me. The side of me that says:

This stuff happens. Carry on.

Last week’s post was about the reality of starting a project and dear reader, you have a front-row seat to my experience. It makes me uncomfortable, but it pushes me to be accountable, too.

By the time the end of the week came through, I knew that there was more work to be done. But first, I needed to lay off the work and take a break.

On Thursday evening, I closed my word processor and accepted that no social media or blogging was going to be done. My mind was shot, my schedule was a mess, and I knew it was time to throw in the towel – for the week.

This is what my process looked like, and maybe it’ll help you navigate your troublesome moments too.

When to temporarily throw in the towel:

  1. Evaluate the situation for what it is

Put your go-getter mentality aside, take a look at what you’re really dealing with, and understand what it is doing to you physically, mentally, and emotionally.

  1. Spell out the conclusions for yourself

This is another way of saying you need to accept that things are not working out and instead of trying to fight through it, you need to pause. Sometimes resistance doesn’t mean “fight back harder”, it means stop fighting and let go.

  1. Ignore the guilt that will try to pull you back

Taking a step back, or putting things on hold, will trigger feelings of doubt. Hold on to your decision to pause everything and follow through. Remind yourself that you need this break.

4. Indulge in activities that bring you joy and rest

This is the time to listen to your body, pay attention to the state of your mind, and let yourself be. Watch a few series, take a nap, read a book (for pleasure), plug a podcast, etc.

5. Try again

This is happens after you’ve allowed yourself to rest. If you want to see your idea live past the initial stages, you’re going to have to get used to trying again many times. I’m learning this reality all over again.

Last week may have only seen two posts out, but I’ve managed to make changes in my personal and professional life that will allow for easier navigation. I spent the weekend identifying a system that would work for me.

This week is for testing it out and so far it’s working. The test will be how I handle this week’s midweek madness. Until then, I’ll keep focusing on how to make this process work for me – and you, of course.

Last week started off really well, but a couple of major curved balls led to two posts and nothing from Wednesday to Friday.

There’s no need to embellish my observations. Last week was hard and I wasn’t able to meet my goal of five posts a week.

But, it hasn’t stopped me from showing up today.

Sometimes, I find myself thinking,

“Why on earth did I agree to this challenge in the first place?” 

I’ll be honest and admit that I’m writing this with a bit of angst in my chest. You’d think, after 2 or 3 years of being vulnerable online, I’d be used to this.

I’m a firm believer in sharing all parts of the process, but I am human too. The thought of saying, 

“Hey, guys. So last week didn’t work out either,” makes me feel nervous because who wants to admit that they’re “failing”?

The anxiety in me pictures the ones shaking their heads thinking, “Girl, give it a rest you aren’t ready.” And while I may never encounter these people face-to-face, the thought still daunts me. No one likes showing their mistakes in front of the world – even if the world is 30 – 40 readers.

I guess it’s part of the conditioning that comes with “Hustle” culture. You have to have everything together at all times.

But, I can’t blame hustle culture alone. There is also the part of me that questions when will I get this right? When does this process become a well-oiled machine?

I’ll be honest and admit that I’ve wondered if I’m ready for this. Did I start too early? Should this have waited?

Simple answer: No.

As I share my fears, doubts, and concerns, I can also acknowledge the stubborn resilience in me. The side of me that says:

This stuff happens. Carry on.

Last week’s post was about the reality of starting a project and dear reader, you have a front-row seat to my experience. It makes me uncomfortable, but it pushes me to be accountable, too.

By the time the end of the week came through, I knew that there was more work to be done. But first, I needed to lay off the work and take a break.

On Thursday evening, I closed my word processor and accepted that no social media or blogging was going to be done. My mind was shot, my schedule was a mess, and I knew it was time to throw in the towel – for the week.

This is what my process looked like, and maybe it’ll help you navigate your troublesome moments too.

When to temporarily throw in the towel:

  1. Evaluate the situation for what it is

Put your go-getter mentality aside, take a look at what you’re really dealing with, and understand what it is doing to you physically, mentally, and emotionally.

  1. Spell out the conclusions for yourself

This is another way of saying you need to accept that things are not working out and instead of trying to fight through it, you need to pause. Sometimes resistance doesn’t mean “fight back harder”, it means stop fighting and let go.

  1. Ignore the guilt that will try to pull you back

Taking a step back, or putting things on hold, will trigger feelings of doubt. You’re going to question your decisions – why you started, should you have started, are you a quitter, etc. Ride the wave, but stick to your decision.

  1. Indulge in activities that bring you joy and rest

This is where you listen to your body

  1. Try again

If you want to see your idea live past the initial stages, you’re going to have to get used to trying again many times. I’m learning this reality all over again.

Last week may have only seen two posts out, but I’ve managed to make changes in my personal and professional life that will allow for easier navigation. I spent the weekend identifying a system that would work for me.

This week is for testing it out and so far it’s working. The test will be how I handle this week’s midweek madness. Until then, I’ll keep focusing on how to make this process work for me – and you, of course.

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